By Dave Bushy, PCC
Calvin Coolidge was the 30th president of the United States. Among other things, he was famous for being a man of few words and for rather pithy comments about his own well-developed ability to stay silent.
His nickname, appropriately, was “Silent Cal.”
It’s no surprise that few people today remember or quote (how could you if he was so silent?) this Vermont native who assumed the presidency after Warren Harding died. Eight years later, Cal left office, just before the 1929 stock market crash that ushered in the Great Depression.
As I work with executives, I sometimes interject a few of Coolidge’s quotations that I know, often as an ice breaker and to add perspective about the communication habits and tools that my clients employ today in their leadership roles. I do this as I learn about the styles that my clients use and to offer them perspective on what I see them routinely employ.
It is not uncommon for leaders these days to feel compelled to be almost the antithesis of Silent Cal. So much of a leader’s job is to communicate, motivate and inspire their companies in what appears to be almost a 24-hour cycle. Leaders feel a need to always be “on,” with speeches, social media, emails and videos, working to get a message out to others. Leaders feel success is a result of being great spokespersons, not good listeners.
But wouldn’t it be useful at times to become better listeners? Communication, after all, is a two-way street.
So often I learn that clients struggle with letting subordinates take the floor, to let them express their views and to encourage them to grow in their own leadership styles. Clients almost feel forced to spend precious little or no time in silence. As a result, they often do not have the ability to focus on contemplation and reflection. And without that, they admit not being able to gain the perspective that can serve them in their roles.
Silent Cal once said, “You can’t know too much, but you can say too much.” This often brings a smile to the lips of a modern executive. And laughter can emerge when I cite Cal’s line, “I have never been hurt by what I have not said.”
In fact, Stephen Covey, more than 80 years later, wrote: “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Without a doubt, Silent Cal was already onto something.
Today we might describe Coolidge as well developed in listening more than speaking, someone who spent time being attentive to people and situations. He once said something that relates to this: “No man ever listened himself out of a job.”
Often, taking the time to listen allows situations to emerge and for ideas to evolve. Silent Cal understood that when he noted, “Never go out to meet trouble. If you just sit still, nine cases out of ten, someone will intercept it before it reaches you.”
Even though he was exceptionally quiet, he undoubtedly had a dry wit and a ready reply that suited the situation at hand. Stories still circulate that he once sat next to a woman at a dinner party who reportedly said to him, “I have made a bet, Mr. Coolidge, that I could get more than two words out of you.” He is said to have replied, “You lose.”
Why bring up an historical figure from so long ago? Perhaps because we can all learn from the past and use it to re-set our path forward as leaders and as fellow travelers on this human journey. Though he was a president, we aren’t any different than Silent Cal, are we? We too can learn to be memorable in a different way.
I’ll leave you with this final quote from Cal: “It takes a great man to be a good listener.”
Dave Bushy of Boston Executive Coaches – bostonexecutivecoaches.com – is a an ICF-certified coach who was trained at the Gestalt International Study Center (GISC). Dave is a former U.S. Army officer and senior airline executive who works with leaders throughout the world.
Photo Courtesy Vermont Historical Society